Prioritizing Presence – A Grandma’s Perspective

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Prioritizing presence a grandmothers perspective

Today I’m sharing another guest post written by my beautiful Mom, Charisse on prioritizing presence from a grandma’s perspective. I’ve shared her articles here on my blog before, but recently my Mom started her very own blog – Holding Hope – and I thought that now was the perfect time to feature her gift of writing once again.

As much as I love creating and sharing new content here every week, last night I was feeling a little burnt out. Homeschool and housekeeping and running a blog and YouTube channel all while getting through your first trimester of pregnancy was beginning to catch up with me.

I sat in bed thinking about what on earth I would share with you guys today, and suddenly the Lord placed the idea in my head to reach out to my Mom. I’ve been wanting to share her blog with you all for so long anyway, and asking her for a guest post seemed like the perfect opportunity.

Prioritizing presence from a grandma's perspective peaceful simple living room

She immediately sent me some articles that she thought might fit well with my audience, and after reading the very first one I found myself weeping. It was so powerful, and I hope it both encourages and challenges you like it did me.

Will your Tomorrow’s be Thankful for Your Today’s?

This room.
When we moved into this house 26 years ago, this room was an office. We changed it into a tiny family room with a comfy couch. I have such sweet memories of all of us piling onto that couch in that tiny room full of love. Homemade popcorn and Friday night movie night. I sat on that couch every morning praying for my children and reading God’s word.

Years passed. Decorations changed. Children grew up and moved out, then moved back in. The tiny room became a bedroom for our daughter, an apartment for our nephew and now, once again an office. And here I sit. I can hear the crickets chirping outside the window. It’s a reminder to me of the stillness of this moment 26 years later. All those memories that seem like yesterday. All the memories this tiny room holds. Here I sit praying for my children, their spouses and my grandchildren.

I think back on those years. All the hurry. All the rushing from activity to activity. All the worry of what I thought was so important to me at the time. Here I sit in the quiet of this room with the whispers of memories rushing past.

I wish I had stopped more often and really, truly understood what was the most important. Time with my little family. Stopping to listen to little voices telling me stories of their days. Really listening and hearing them. Not allowing my mind to wander as they talked. Thinking about what I would make for dinner or where I would have to be or what I would have to do later that day or that week or that month. Just stopping in the moment and soaking it in. Because that exact moment would never come again.

Being thankful in the moment as a mother, time to stop and reflect

Today my days seem to all be the same. What was my life? It was a vapor, but I didn’t realize it when I was younger. And now today turns into tomorrow and yet it continually feels the same. And I see those little faces in this room talking to me and giggling and I remember my mind trying to heed the advice of the older women before me. “Enjoy it because it goes by so fast”. And yet my mind was a million miles away to my list of things I thought had to be done.

What do your days hold? What is the purpose of your life? Is your life a fulfillment of the dreams you had when you were younger? Is this what you wanted your life to look like? Do you have joy in your moments? Are you happy? What is the end goal of each day? Of the minutes that turn into hours and days and years? What is the purpose of your life?

peaceful living room setting to remember to prioritize your presence

What are you doing today that your tomorrows will be thankful for? Will you be thankful for your job? Your home? Cleaning and running from task to task with no time to breathe? Late night meetings, early morning alarms, emails and texts and notifications, just to start all over again? Mindlessly making dinner and doing laundry and dishes and baths and prayers and bedtime, but never truly being present? Picking up toys and collapsing into bed just to begin all over again? Why?

Why?

So often in our younger years our focus is on the future. That job that will make more money. That diet and exercise program that will make us healthier and happier. That furniture we’ve always wanted. That perfect home we’ve always dreamt of. We have no guarantee we will see tomorrow and yet our generation has become so focused on our tomorrows that we forget about all the beauty in each moment of today. If we don’t have time to focus on our Savior, if we are too busy to truly be present for our children, if we are too tired to enjoy time with our spouse every evening~
then our lives need to change.

Our priorities need to change, because nothing in this world is more important than your Savior and your family.

What will your children remember about today? One day as you sit in your family room when they are grown and gone and look back on today, is this what you want your today to look like for your children? For your family? Is this what you want them to remember? Will you remember being present. Really present?
Is that what they will remember?

And so I ask again. What are you doing today that your tomorrows will be thankful for? Because today will never come again.

Encouragement on prioritizing presence as a mother from a grandma's perspective

I encourage you, as a mom who is now living in those tomorrows and a grandma who now realizes how important her todays are~ stop and be still and watch and listen and smile and breathe and find beauty and joy and laughter. Dance and sing, listen and hug. Tickle and giggle. Hold them and rock them.
Love them with your everything.

Love them with your everything.

You do not have to continue on the path you have made. Be fearless in your Father and change the direction your path is going.

The path of all your beautiful tomorrows starts with each beautiful moment today.

Prioritizing your presence as a young mother with multiple children

Wasn’t that an amazing reminder to us all? I know I needed to read this, and since God led me to ask my Mom for a guest post, I’m sure someone else needed to read this, too.

I hope this was an encouragement to you, friends. If it was, will you let me know in the comments below? And by the way, my Mom’s blog is filled with more articles of hope and encouragement like this one, and my hope is that you will head over there and subscribe to her blog, today!

Thanks so much for stopping by,

PIN IT FOR LATER

Prioritizing presence a grandmothers perspective

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101 Comments

  1. A lovely message. I’m a grandmother now myself. And I hope my daughter can find ways to shift her focus. She’s so tired and discouraged right now. So much is expected of women. So many ways to be criticized. So few ways to be lifted up. We need to be kinder to each other…not when it is convenient but always. Thank you for sharing this with us.

    1. You are very welcome, I was so thankful for my mothers wisdom and even more excited about sharing it with you. I am encouraged to keep reading from you all that it has been such a blessing!

  2. Beautiful..just what I needed for I am walking that road with you also..love to read more of these. I am so impressed with your faith.,Will you share how you met our savior and what church you attend..Your love truly radiates every blog…prayer and love…

    1. Such a loving description of the fierce activity we fill our lives when our children are young. Thank you for the reminder that we can change our present.

  3. Thank you for this lovely read…it is so true how we all rush through our days…only to get to the next one…before I became a grandmother I did encourage my children to enjoy every day, slow down and don’t stress …now as a grandmother I try harder to enforce that…thank you again 😊

    1. Yes, my mom says you realize it so much more as a grandmother. I am trying so hard to keep focused on this now. I am happy it was a blessing to you!

  4. This was beautifully written. As a grandmother myself, I remember those moments and sometimes my regrets. Our todays matter. Don’t give up. Make today count and encourage others!

    1. You are very welcome, I know my mom will be so encouraged to read how much of an encouragement God has allowed her to be!

  5. Glory is God’s in her wisdom through her journey. Very relatable in the perspective of His Presence and noticing our family in the needing to slow down and be still. Love all she shared. So full of Truth in every day Living. Now even more, In the discernment of the pandemic that has stopped us all in one way or another. Breathing again, prioritizing and listening in the being still bringing His Presence back into perspective, how important it is to Him but more how important it is for us, in spiritual nutrition. He has Trusted us with the family (even the animals.) He has Given to us to love and teach in His Wisdom that today they may understand the past, present and future before it escapes without His Knowledge to know He brings and Gives His Blessings in riches where He Adds no sorrow~~~ Thank you for sharing and allowing God to release this beautiful reflection of wisdom and Truth in Pure Unadulterated Truth, His, in everyday Living, while learning to be still and listen👐❤👐

  6. I have never commented on any blogs or diy videos that I’ve read or seen but today your moms words were heaven sent . Thank you and definitely thank her for those words that personally I know were from MY HEAVENLY FATHER . GOD BLESS YOU YOUR FAMILY AND YOUR MOM .

  7. Worth the read! Thank you for the precious reminder of being present in the present which is quite hard to do most of the time. However, when we really take the time to sit down and think upon the Savior and all He has done and continue to do in our lives then the cares of this world become dim and Hope becomes alive again in our weary hearts.

  8. Very well stated. I am a grandma now and see exactly what she is saying and agree whole heartedly. You are Blessed to have your mom in your life. My sweet momma is 86 now and needs me physically more than ever and I consider it a joy to serve her in love and enjoy the moments we share together.

  9. I remember an older woman telling me that her mother worked so hard to give the “Extra Things” to her children, such as, vacations, more gifts, a bigger house etc. But when the children were asked what they thought of All this their answer was quite surprising when they said “All we want is You, Mom”.

    Sometimes we just need to be reminded!

  10. Very wise words by your mother! Sometimes we expect too much from ourselves. Why? For whom? What do we want to prove? That we have wort? That we are perfect? To whom? Just a few days ago I read something along the same line like you mother wrote: “For while we have our eyes on the future, history has its eyes on us.” (Amanda Gormon: The hills we climb).
    Your mother just thought about her and her family’s personal history.
    Taking the luxury of not chasing any dream or goal, it’s interesting that I sometimes think: Will I be resentful later of the many times I spent sitting on a comfy chair, reading fiction and watching other peoples lives on youtube? But what if I will have hard times then, with hunger and no one to help me when I’m old and ill? Experiencing a war like my parents, perhaps beeing a refugee and losing all my life’s savings? Would I not cherish the remembrance of these comfortable times?
    So I agree with your mother: Make your times as comfortable, stressless and joyful as you can and be aware of it and the people around you in thanking the Lord consciously for all the little things. So you cherish the present now and can do it again in the future when looking back. Twice!

    1. Yes! I love this quote so much too. I am so happy that you agree and it was a good reminder. Your comment holds so much truth as well!

  11. I myself have been reflecting on the past bringing up my children. God knows everything he knows our heart and the hearts of our children. I always felt a little distanced from one of my son’s. I felt I didn’t have the same quality time with him but God’s grace is amazing. Now that he is older (in his thirties) he needs me more than ever I can spend quality time with him, calm his worries and fears. He now visits me daily we share lots of time together share meals together. He keeps me focused and I am making up for the time we were distanced. Making a difference is for the present not something that has gone, family is important each day you awake. What you do today will make a difference in the future, it’s never too late to listen xxx

    1. I am so happy to hear that your relationship with your son is doing so much better. What a blessing I am sure you are so thankful for that!

  12. Andrea your mom’s post was SO inspirational! I popped over and signed up for her blog just now. I’m fairly new to your YouTube channel and have really enjoyed your posts! Please take time to get the rest you need, especially now. God’s got you, and you do an amazing job! God’s blessings to all of you!!

    1. Thank you for your kind words, I know my mom’s blog will encourage you and I am so happy you have been enjoying my blog as well! Thank you!

  13. Yes, this was worthwhile reading ALL the way to the end. Thank you for following the Lords leading to reach out to your mom.
    I am a mom of many and although I’m a grammy, I still have 6 kiddos at home. I have a LONG way to go before I’ll have a quiet home, and time to look back. But this was a wonderful reminder to slow down and take in the “moments” of each day. Thank you. I’m headed over to your moms blog now to subscribe. 🙂

    1. It was such perfect timing and I needed the rest. I am so so happy that it was encouraging to you! Six kids is a lot, but I am praying you find peace in the little moments.

  14. I was only thinking last night about what is my purpose in life? I’m now in my early 70’s have a wonderful husband, and three grown up handsome sons. Unfortunately no grandchildren which breaks my heart. I was just wondering at this present time of Covid, England is in it’s third lockdown, and not seeing my elderly mother, or two of my sons for months , what am I doing for God, no churches are open and can’t meet up with anyone outside our “bubble”!! My bible study talks about working for God, but how can I when we are so isolated? I do pray every day and night for my family and the world, so I suppose that’s as much as I can do at the moment.
    I think your mum’s blog post is a wake-up call for me and many others to make time for each other when we can. Thank you and her for your time. Please look after yourself and your sweet family. God bless xxxxxooooo

    1. Wow, all of that definitely seems like it could be discouraging so fast. With this entire pandemic, it has been so easy to slip into deep discouragement and also wonder what the future will even bring. I agree, her post was so encouraging and I really am praying moving forward we can all keep our focus where we need to.

  15. Oh I so needed that this evening. I had what I thought was a horrible day. As I read your moms post, I stopped and counted my blessings. I too and a grandma now, kids are gone and I relate with the feeling of not really enjoying the little things, when I kids were small. So thank you for the one thing I needed this evening. To stop and count my blessings.

  16. As tears fall into my coffee I type this… first off your family just overflows with talent. I could read this everyday. I need to read this everyday. A million thank you’s, this was so powerful, touching and True. Please send your mom my blessings

  17. Andrea … I love what your mom has written here, very profound ~ thank you for sharing!! I have subscribed to her blog & thank you for sharing that, also!! Have a very blessed weekend!

  18. Every mother with a young family lives in a busy whirl and sometimes chaos. The laundry, endless meals, cleaning, coordinating the family’s schedules and providing transportation, often consume us. Many of us have full time jobs outside the home and so are always juggling. Charisse certainly doesn’t need to be concerned about whether or not she had the right priorities. Andrea you didn’t just turn out to be the beautiful and warm woman that you are, by chance. You are a reflection of your mother’s love and the nurturing she gave you as a child and throughout your life. Both of you are great successes as mothers. Never doubt that for a moment.

    1. Wow, what a beautiful compliment to my mom. I know when she reads this she will be so encouraged by it. Thank you for sharing these beautiful words!

  19. As an “Oma” these words spoke to my heart. A good lesson to enjoy and give praise for the NOW. Not that long ago I was trying to figure out how we could manage all of the sports games that our dear grandchildren are involved in. Weekends were hectic…..and then Covid changed our lives and I long for the hectic weekends of healthy children running bases and kicking soccer balls. Thank you for this post. It was a gift. ❤️

  20. Andrea, this is just what I needed to read today to ground me from all the chaos and difficulties in these times. You’re mother has a way with words and such wonderful wisdom that I will take to heart! Thank you and your mom so much for sharing! I will definitely subscribe to her blog. She has a God given talent as a writer. How blessed are you and your family to have her as a mom and grandma!
    Thanks again for the inspiring message of truth and grace!
    Blessings to you all!

  21. Your mother spoke what I have been feeling…..slow down…. enjoy them while you are with them.
    Thank you for sharing💕

  22. Thank you for sharing your mom’s words. I went to her blog and read several posts and subscribed as well. Looking forward to her encouragement and words of wisdom.

  23. For sure, Clarisse is a powerful teacher. I’m reminded of a saying I heard years ago that has stuck with me: at our best, we are all teachers.
    I would add that every day of our lives we have an opportunity to minister to others, age or stage doesn’t matter. Thank you for sharing. You are both powerful and loving forces. ❤️

    1. That is so incredibly kind of you to say. We are humbled to read all of your comments, and so thankful God has allowed us to encourage others.

  24. I love this. Your mother has a way with words. As a grandmother myself I know how quickly life goes by. I miss those crazy busy days with my boys. I sent this to my daughter in law. Thank you

  25. Thank you so much for this. Just the reminder I needed , as a nana myself I often tell my children to slow down and enjoy the moment. It all seems so busy now but when they have grown and gone and you have that tidy home, you will long for those times again Praise the Lord we have grandchildren to enjoy .
    Your mom is a beautiful writer and I will head on over to her blog now.
    Thank you for your gentleness,I love hearing about your day. May you be Blessed in all things Your a wonderful mom ❤️🙏❤️

    1. Oh my goodness, you are so sweet. We truly all need the encouragement and reminders all the time. I am so happy that this was a blessing to you though!

  26. All I can say is, thank you, thank you! My heart and soul needed to be filled with your thought filled words. 🙌😊

  27. Andrea, what your Mother has written is so beautiful and oh so true. As a grandmother you think back on life and now you see what is really important in life. God bless you and your beautiful family and what a wonder Mother you have . Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful advise to with all of us.

    1. You are very welcome, God worked it out in such perfect timing, I needed the break from writing and I have been wanting to share her with you all for quite a while.

  28. I enjoyed that so very much!! I am a mom of two boys (6 and 8) and I’ve followed you on IG for years. I have always pondered your upbringing and you’ve shared some. The reason I pondered this is because you seem to have a good grasp on your priorities in life. My entire goal since becoming a mom has solely been on my family and your mom’s words are such encouragement. I really loved this, it was truly a treat. I will definitely check out your mom’s blog.

    1. I am so so encouraged just by reading all of these comments! I am so so thankful for my mother, her wisdom and how she chose to raise me. I hope you do check out her blog, you truly will love it!

  29. Wow. Did this ever hit home. As a mother now of grown children with children of their own, I feel as if I have a foot in 3 different worlds. My parents, especially my Mom, my own, and my adult children. How often I find myself remembering, the words said to me by my Mom, and how much I sound like her now!, and how “SMART and wise my parent really were, and I just thought they were old fashioned, and uninformed. How naïve I was, as a young person, and mother. Their gone now, my Mom and Dad, and I’m now where they were with my children. How I wish I could hug my mother, and share something hilarious with my Dad. How I wish that I could go back, and inhale the scent of my daughter after she’s played outside, covered in sweat and dirt. Not focus on muddy footprints. How I “wish” because I can’t. Those moments are gone. But I’ll change that with my grandchildren. I know now. Life “is” fleeting. We have to live in the moment, we have to experience them, and not worry about what we now understand is just not that important. Thank “YOU” Andrea’s Mom, and you too Andrea, for having us all stop and really reflect on “Now”, and what really is important.

    1. Yes, it truly is so so important. It all goes so quickly. I am sure my mom will be encouraged by your sweet words, thank you for taking the time to share them!

  30. A beautiful reflection by your mother and so very true! As a woman who grew up during the “feminist” movement of the 70s, I was told I could do it all and have it all. Such a fallacy. Enjoy every moment with your children. Your house does not need to be perfect and neither do you. Your house needs to be a home. A place of love and hope and nurturing and a dwelling place for the Holy Trinity. I often tell my daughter of three that at times you get so caught up in the day to day that it can become overwhelming. You can’t see the forest for the trees. Step back and breathe. Andrea, you are an inspiration to all and just as I am so very proud of .y three daughters, I know your mother is so proud of you and all you do to bring comfort and peace to this chaotic world. May God bless you all! 💝💝

    1. Wow, what an incredible perspective. Thank you for sharing this with me. I am glad you enjoyed my moms words, but your comment was so encouraging to me as well, thank you!

  31. That was an absolutely beautiful message from
    your mom so so so hit home with me as i sit n my office that was once my children’s playroom the memories come crashing through so many times and how i wish i did give one more hug or kiss i now have a 24 year old daughter n the sadness of my son passing away 3 yrs ago when he was only 22. i would give anythg to return to the innocent days of them growing up and cherishing every single minute of the day. i will def subscribe to your mom’s blog she sounds like a wonderful caring person who raised a beautiful loving daughter Thk you

    1. I am so sorry to hear this. I pray you are healing from this as well. I hope these words from my mom were encouraging to you and I am encouraged by your sweet and kind words as well.

  32. I am thankful for this post and every word said is so true. I was tearful while reading, because I found that I myself have been focusing on the wrong things❤️ What a wonderful reminder of what’s most important! You guys are making a difference and your voices are heard and mean so much for sharing the gospel. Jesus is using this blog for so much good!!

    1. So happy it was an encouragement to you! We all can get wrapped up in the wrong things as well, so happy that Jesus is using it! He is so good to us!

  33. Thank you so much for sharing this! I definitely needed it! Like desperately. I just about bawled reading it. I have always noticed that you are tender hearted, which is of great value in the eyes of our Lord. I can now see where the beauty of tender heartedness comes from. God bless you sweet Andrea. Keep up the good work of your Lord and Savior!

    1. It will bless my mom so much reading all of your sweet comments. I am so thankful God used her to encourage so many, I know she truly encouraged me!

  34. Andrea, I thank God that you were obedient to Him when He placed it on your heart to reach out to your Mom, and she shared these beautifully truthful and very encouraging words. A true reminder for me to be present with those I love so dearly, to cherish those times, and not to allow things/tasks that don’t really matter steal the gift of time with my love ones that The Lord blesses me with at that present moment. Your Mom’s words also reminded me that we must remain hopeful in Christ no matter what. Yes, a lot is going on in our World (truthfully, it always has been), and I have at times been guilty of feeling discouraged, feeling defeated, and when I would try to encourage myself; I would at times think… “What’s the point,” so at times it has been a struggle to remain encouraged. I am beginning to see that when I would feel this way was when I was allowing the current situation to “become bigger” than My God. I have to constantly remember that was Not what I believe, because I Know that My God is Bigger than Any situation, including this current season in which the World is experiencing (Thank You Jesus for the revelation).
    Andrea, your Mom’s words are a reminder to me to remain hopeful and to be present, so that My tomorrows will be thankful for my todays. I am grateful for you, your Mom, her encouraging words, and for The Lord’s hand in this post that you have shared with us. Be blessed, take care, remain hopeful, stay encouraged, be present, and take care.

    In Christ,
    Paula

  35. She speaks my feelings. I miss the days my daughters were young. I hold the tears of time wasted worrying about this and that which I now look back as unimportant. I now have 2 granddaughters who I rocked and cared for while their mommy was at work, who at 11 and 13.are slipping through my fingers ( as my daughters did) and I want to scream”stop!” Stop growing my little girls, my little babies. But I know with the Grace of God I will be attending THEIR weddings, THEIR births and the only thing I can do is slow down and make our moments last because like your mom, I now know what’s truly important.💕😊

    1. Oh my goodness, so you truly understand as well. I was so so happy that she wrote and shared this, I knew it would be perfect for so many.

  36. Oh Andrea what a great post, I needed to read this!! Even though my Children are grown up I can still pass these great words to them!! Thanks so much for sharing!!

  37. This is such a meaningful read. I’m at the stage in life where my kids are grown and gone and I am grateful for all our beautiful memories. I am very proud of who they’ve become. At times, I feel a little homesick for those early days, as they seem to be but a breath and then they are gone. I am grateful for knowing the importance of being present, so the next stage in life can be savored with long deep breaths , smelling the flowers , feeling the sunlight, and listening to the birds sing as I drink my coffee.
    Now, I have the blessed opportunity to hug and squeeze my grandson , and enjoy every single moment with an understanding that today is only for today.
    I am blessed by this article.

    1. I am so happy to read this sweet comment. Her post was so perfect for so many and I am so grateful God used her to be such a blessing through my blog!

  38. Andrea, that message that you shared from your mother, oh it was so beautiful. As I was ready I clung to every word. I love the rhythmic ebbs and flows and the reflective words that she chose to describe her thoughts about being present. Such a simple task, but one that escapes us often. Thank you so much for sharing.

  39. I’m writing this message of thanks with misty eyes. I have recently felt the pull to return to church and open myself up to the word of God – missing in my life for so long. Your words have added strength to that feeling and attest to the goodness of life in the everyday. Andrea has led by example in the way she gives thanks to the Lord in subtle ways and I realise now that way of being has come from the nurture she received from home. Thank you – this came at just the right time. God bless.